Posts Tagged ‘Sadopaeidia’

So yesterday was an odd type day. In the morning, The Boyfriend was kinda mad at me, for a variety of reasons, most of which he had complete rights to. He had posted a status to Facebook, which he only ever does when he wants me to know something’s up.

After spending almost the entire day in complete silence, not touching each other, I decided I was going to soak in a nice hot bath. Again, I’m reading Sadopaeidia (which I seem to go through every couple of baths), and The Boyfriend comes down to share a smoke. Guess who was naked?

Well, of course, I was! And so was he, except his socks – weirdo! After some gentle water rubbing (rather non-sexually), I pulled him into the bath with me (yes, he took off his socks…). And again, we successfully had bath tub sex in my tinsy tiny tub.

Bath tub sex is seriously fun. It’s awkward and uncomfortable, but in a way that you’re not afraid to laugh at it. The water feels nice swishing around you. And The Boyfriend kind of lifts me up with ease and it’s just a different kind of sex completely.

After the bath, things went from Woohoo to Ugh… I was all like, “Wow, I wasn’t expecting that. Especially with you being mad at me.” This sparked an entire conversation, that turned to a debate because I bitched about him posting a status on Facebook for everyone who doesn’t even know me, and his sister who does, to find out that he has a problem with our relationship before I do.

Of course, that got thrown back in my face real quick, being that on occasion, I’ve posted stuff on my blog about our relationship that I didn’t tell him previously. He was even able to name the exact post that his sister confronted him and asked what kind of problems we were having that I would write it.

So I’ve officially discovered why I don’t argue with The Boyfriend. And that’s because, he argues exactly like I do. He’s able to back up his argument, and doesn’t just talk out of his ass. And like I said earlier, he has every right to be upset, and I would think he was seriously psychotic if he wasn’t upset.

I keep having Alfie over after The Boyfriend goes to work, even though we agreed a long time ago that Alfie wouldn’t come over after The Boyfriend left. I don’t know why I keep doing it, especially being that I know it upsets The Boyfriend alot and I don’t want to cause him upset. I’m hoping eventually I can get it together and stop doing things that bother him, especially when I know that they bother him. First I think, I need to figure out why it is that I continue to do these things even when I know better.

So the good thing is, I got laid and we both got stuff off our chests!

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Woo! Today was a good day, in the blogging sense. I officially hit the 20 visitor mark!!! It only took me three weeks, and almost no promotion whatsoever, to reach my first XXX Rated Rantings milestone. Thanks to all who are reading.

So I found out an interesting tidbit today. The Boyfriend has been secretly reading Sadopaeidia by Anonymous – my current favourite erotic novel. His favourite part is my favourite part too. I’ve been reading his Forgotten Realms by R.A. Salvatore books for months now, and I’ve expressed extreme interest in him reading one of my erotic books for a year and a half. So I was pretty excited when he said he’s been reading at least one of them. I knew leaving them in the bathroom would eventually work 😉

The Boyfriend has been nothing but a tease these last two days. It’s his days off, normally days we have sex. Yesterday, there was alot of talk about how that night was going to be a sex night, and then sadly, he fell asleep while I was breastfeeding. Today has been the worst, and it’s made worse by the fact that I know that it’s just teasing.

First, he’s sitting on the couch with my hairbrush and he starts slapping it against his leg covered in denim jeans. The sound was truly exhilarating, this sharp thuddy sound. I made him stop that one really quickly. Then, he bought himself a belt with these little studs on it. He’s walking around the house with his shirt off, and the belt was glimmering and I said that it could potentially be fun. Then he goes and tells me he’s been reading my erotica. How much do you want to bet that he’ll fall asleep before I’m done breastfeeding again?

You know, it wouldn’t bother me at all, if he said to me that he was denying sex for some reason, or if he said that I was being punished. But not having sex, just because we’re not, is killing me. The only times in my life that I go this long without sex is when I’m single or when I’m pregnant. And I’m neither of those things!

Life has been pretty stressful these last couple of weeks, and my desire for an emotional release through pleasurable pain is through the roof. After almost two years of not, I broke down the other day at the height of my stress – every trigger was being pressed – and gave myself two little cuts. I had forgotten what it was like…

So someone awhile back, found my blog by searching “audio to masturbate to” – probably found it since it was the same week as WTMFI Wednesdays: Week 2 – Masturbation. And it got me thinking about good music to masturbate to. Being that I often masturbate in the bathtub (when I do masturbate, which isn’t very often), I don’t normally listen to music. Though I totally would!

I would imagine that music that you have sex to is good for listening to when you masturbate. It also really depends on what you’re into musically in the first place. Someone whose into heavy metal wouldn’t necessarily be turned on by Mozart’s “Moonlight Sonota” (which Steve-O and Sandy have sex to while on acid in SLC Punk, one of my all time favourite movies!!), whereas someone who is into more of a dark rock type sound, might be turned on by Nine Inch Nails’ “Discipline”. Some people would enjoy Britney Spears’ “I’ve got that Boom Boom” or maybe Justin Timberlake ft. Ciara with “Love, Sex, Magic”. It really depends on your taste in music, your mood for that moment, and the type of atmosphere you’re trying to create for yourself.

Another thing to consider is your visualization skills. If you’re good at visualizing things on your own, without porn or erotica, then pretty much any music would work. If, on the other hand, you have a hard time visualizing things and need porn or erotica, then you’re music should attempt to match the type of stimulation you’re using. For instance, if you’re watching alot of anal stuff, or reading about it or looking at it or whatever you’re doing with the ass area in general, I would definitely say these are 10 songs that should be on your masturbation playlist:

(NOTE: The average man only lasts 2 – 6 minutes, so only 2 or 3 of these songs would be needed for a session)

  • Bubba Sparx – Ms. New Booty
  • Ludacris ft. Shawna – How Low Can You Go
  • Destiny’s Child – Bootylicious
  • Queen – Fat Bottomed Girls
  • Kelis – Milkshake
  • Mindless Self Indulgence – Ultrasex (Not necessarily just for anal;))
  • Mystikal – Shake Your Ass
  • Sean Paul – Shake That Thing
  • Ying Yang Twins – Ass Cheeks on my White Tee
  • Chamillionaire – Grown and Sexy

Man, I need to get my ID so that I can go out dancing again. I miss the days of skanky dancing. I don’t really get the chance to be much of a sexual deviant at all in my house. My 5-year-old would pick up on it too much. When I showed an interest in belly dancing, guess who learnt how to do figure eights before me!! So imagine what would it be like if I was dropping it like it was hot on a regular basis around her.

I don’t even know if I’d still know how to move it like I used to. I haven’t been dancing in almost three years!!! I can’t believe it’s been that long… I used to just go dancing when I was pregnant all the time. I was the only pregnant girl out on the dancefloor! Hopefully by the end of the year, I’ll be able to go dancing, because I miss it so much!!

I’ve been teasing The Boyfriend with a dirty dance for months now. I just want to wait until I tone up more. I wouldn’t, under almost any circumstance, put me in the fat category. I’m still in single digits in dress and pant size, and I’m in the perfect weight range for my height and age. But I have had four kids, and my body is absolutely not what it used to be – especially not what it was back in the days of skanky dancing. Maybe one day 😉

I’ve read alot on FetLife about leash dances, and I think that would be so erotic. If one day, The Boyfriend put a collar around my neck with a leash attached, and hung the leash up using a hook of some sort and instructed me to dance for him, I think I probably would. And I would probably play Chamillionaire’s “Grown and Sexy” or Kelis’ “Milkshake”.

Well here’s hopping that soon the XXX Rated Rantings starts getting some comments and I’ll be looking forward to the 30 visitor mark!!! What’s some music that you enjoy listening to when you’re masturbating or having sex?

Do you ever feel like you’re just not getting what you want sexually? I do. Almost every day of the week. There’s not enough of it, it’s not rough enough, it’s not soft enough, it doesn’t change enough. I wonder if I’ll ever truly be satisfied with my sex life.

The other night I took the Sexual Addiction Screening Test. I scored a nine, which officially makes me a sex addict. Last year, when I took the test, I didn’t even meet the criteria for potential to become a sex addict. This year, thanks to massive preoccupations with thoughts of sex, I scored as a sex addict. Though I know that the test is mostly inaccurate. Having sex once a week, with the same guy over and over again, probably doesn’t constitute sexual addiction.

I wish that it was more fun to tell guys what you want. Maybe when men are older they listen. But at my age, they hear you once and then almost never again. I tell him I want more compliments, so he says one thing and then no compliments forever. I tell him I want more oral sex, happens once and hasn’t been offered since. I tell him I want to go back to spanking, and then it never happens.

Our sex is wonderful, even though it’s a thousand times more vanilla than I want it to be. It’s fun, it’s intimate, it feels good. I’m not complaining. I could spend the rest of my life having our vanilla sex. But I want so much more. I want to be seduced and teased and then punished and spanked. I want to fuck!

I’ve started reading Sadopaeidia by Anonymous for at least my fourth time now. I seriously love that book so much! The only thing I’ve ever hated about BDSM-y erotica, is that it’s not presented as a consensual act. No wonder people think us kinksters are so crazy. Does anyone know of any erotica that presents a consensual perspective for BDSM? If not, why do you think that is?

I also downloaded The Kama Sutra and have been skimming through that. I’ve been putting off reading it for a really long time. After I watched a movie of the same title, I was a little turned off of the book. But now, I’m a bit more excited. It’d be alot more fun if The Boyfriend had some sort of interest in expanding his sexual knowledge, because then we could read it together.

When we first got together, my sister had sent me her copy of The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty by Anne Rice writing as A.N. Roquelaure. She found the book “too hardcore”, and I had been going off about wanting to read it forever. The Boyfriend and I agreed that we would start reading it out loud to each other before bed every night. That lasted one day, when alas, he fell asleep while I was reading the first chapter to him. Never tried it again.

Today, I’m feeling disappointed about my sex life. Not only have I been bleeding pretty much since my youngest was born (and that puts a huge damper on sex for me), we also really haven’t had much time. Most nights, The Boyfriend works graveyard, and when he is home, he’s really too tired at night. If we could manage to sneak away during the day, we could have sex, but there’s four young kids running around constantly.

If you would’ve asked me, even as little as a year ago, if I thought that I’d still be having vanilla sex, I’d straight up laugh in your face. A year ago, I had all these dreams about what I wanted sexually. I went to my first munch and thought that was the first big step towards me becoming kinky. Unfortunately, nothing has worked out the way I planned it. Especially where sex is concerned. Is anyone else dissatisfied with their sex life?